If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
I'm currently watching porn and playing beer pong with wine in the lobby of a hotel with a squadron of hot airforce guys. You can never say your life is better than mine again
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
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