I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
A toast to whoever set this year's daylight savings fallback to the day after halloween, granting us another hour to detox before we pretend to be functional adults. Clearly, a partier with forethought and clear priorities. Cheers!
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
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