Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
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Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
He just canceled. I got an amazing new dress and now he’s decided he’s spending the weekend with his family
In other news, there’s some rando in an expensive hotel bar who is going to get very lucky tonight because I love the way this dress makes my tits look. Want to help me find him?
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