my sisters under your porch take her home
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
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I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
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I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
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