your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
in my drunkeness I still was able to plan for the morning. I duck taped my keys, a water bottle full of mimosa and my cell phone to the front door.
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
Randomize