i tried to light my apt on fire. reasons why drunks and women should not cook
hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
I got to her place and she was petting her cat and pounding vodka out of the bottle. She looked like Dr evil in yoga pants. She's nuttier than squirrell shit.
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
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