you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
I forgot drug dealers have families, too. Cheers to a sober, uncomfortable, slightly enraging Thanksgiving.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
He's giving me the absolute bare minimum amount of attention. Like whatever motherfucker, I've had like six super likes on tinder today
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
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