There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
I love millennial parents. One of the moms at the daycare center literally told me she and her husband named two of her kids after batman characters and one after game of thrones
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