we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
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