i think my tv is drunk
Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
I just puked on the sidewalk. At 11am. Thought you'd like to know.
Just found out I lit my hair on fire last night.
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