Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
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