Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
Randomize