Texts From Last Night · Last Night in (610)

Last Night in Pennsylvania (610)

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I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.

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(610): I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse. http://tfl.nu/qk0b

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Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.

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(610): Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name. http://tfl.nu/1ows

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There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here.

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(610): There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here. http://tfl.nu/6w86

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she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl

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(610): she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl http://tfl.nu/lpki

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it is 7:54 and i am surrounded by drunk old people. drunk enough that my grandmother and her friend just compared boobs. as in, shirts off, bras coming down. save me.

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(610): it is 7:54 and i am surrounded by drunk old people. drunk enough that my grandmother and her friend just compared boobs. as in, shirts off, bras coming down. save me. http://tfl.nu/3ypx

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I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.

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(610): I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date. http://tfl.nu/jj8c

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just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?

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well i fucked her too, so yes.

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(484): just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested? (610): well i fucked her too, so yes. http://tfl.nu/6v2h

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It was my birthday today and i decided that i am not checking my notifications on facebook so ill feel popular

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Wrong number and your a loser

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(215): It was my birthday today and i decided that i am not checking my notifications on facebook so ill feel popular (610): Wrong number and your a loser http://tfl.nu/k831

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just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing

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(610): just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing http://tfl.nu/xxuk

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dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.

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(610): dude, she masturbates with a ken doll. http://tfl.nu/7x56

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The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.

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(610): The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices. http://tfl.nu/tdjd

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At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?

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Right after we had the just friends talk..

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(610): At what point last night did I start ordering doubles? (856): Right after we had the just friends talk.. http://tfl.nu/zby8

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all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck

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(610): all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck http://tfl.nu/mnqh

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Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......

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(610): Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain....... http://tfl.nu/fodn

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My cat gives me a boner

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(610): My cat gives me a boner http://tfl.nu/df3i

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Last Night in Pennsylvania (610)

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