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  • Submitted by wtfwjd on Jul 21, 10 at 10:32am

    Hmmm...what the fuck would Jesus do in this situation?

    • 37 42
      Submitted by Moser on Jul 22, 10 at 3:21am

      the only time that you gain the approval of us... enjoy it

  • 80 39
    Submitted by TheOctopus on Jul 21, 10 at 12:37pm

    WOMAN, JESUS DOES NOT NEED TO USE HIS HAND TO BRING YOU TO CLIMAX

  • 85 63
    Submitted by Slappy0605 on Jul 21, 10 at 10:27am

    The things fat chicks say...never fail to amaze me

    • 32 56
      Submitted by anonymous8906 on Jul 21, 10 at 12:57pm

      everyone loves birthday cake.

  • 79 54
    Submitted by IfSheSpinsFast on Jul 21, 10 at 10:12am

    Uhm, that scenario sounds TERRIBLE.

  • 79 57
    Submitted by klangford on Jul 21, 10 at 1:02pm

    I think we can all agree that E.T. has dibs on being the Finger Master, that shit glows AND it's 14 inches.

    • 41 50
      Submitted by meghannnn on Jul 21, 10 at 1:32pm

      how would glowing make it any more pleasurable? if i wanted that, i'd use a flashlight.

  • 80 76
    Submitted by hroach on Jul 21, 10 at 10:19am

    Wow..come on have some respect.

  • 59 43
    Submitted by smartgrrl2 on Jul 21, 10 at 2:39pm

    ...and if it wasn't for my horse, I wouldn't have spent that year in college...

  • 59 47
    Submitted by Anonymous on Jul 22, 10 at 3:16am

    Your going to hell, don't talk about God like thy

  • 55 42
    Submitted by SillyShit19 on Jul 21, 10 at 1:26pm

    Wife material for sure.

  • 56 53
    Submitted by LilOne on Jul 21, 10 at 3:45pm

    That's so wrong!

  • 48 45
    Submitted by karla on Jul 21, 10 at 4:24pm

    Why would you even say that it doesn't even sound appealing

  • 54 58
    Submitted by meghannnn on Jul 21, 10 at 12:02pm

    Why do people assume Jesus would have good fingering skills? Just because he's the son of God doesn't mean he's a casanova.

    • 50 67
      Submitted by anonymous8906 on Jul 21, 10 at 12:59pm

      umm...carpenter hands.

      • 40 37
        Submitted by nattybuck on Jul 21, 10 at 5:26pm

        yeah but they're holey now not holy, and i am quite sure there is nerve damage.

  • 39 32
    Submitted by superstardeke1 on Jul 22, 10 at 12:31pm

    U're sick. Don't write things like that using the name of the Lord.

  • 47 50
    Submitted by Bomb on Jul 21, 10 at 6:05pm

    That's just fucked up. Leave Jesus out of your obesity.

  • 51 60
    Submitted by Creeperstar on Jul 21, 10 at 10:54am

    I need a girl like this.

  • 48 55
    Submitted by bowfishinlady on Jul 21, 10 at 12:28pm

    This is tacky as fuck!

  • 42 45
    Submitted by dirtyfirsty on Jul 21, 10 at 10:04am

    .....

  • 44 54
    Submitted by TheNewRule on Oct 9, 10 at 1:17pm

    Just FYI, Jesus has a dirty beard, didn't wear deodorant, and didn't bathe.\nRule 423: Fucking dirty people is gross....

  • 44 55
    Submitted by APromiseToBurn on Jul 21, 10 at 1:08pm

    Akward......

  • 41 50
    Submitted by shame_on_u on Jul 22, 10 at 2:53am

    Shame on u for having impure thoughts of our lord

  • 43 55
    Submitted by cbtango on Jul 22, 10 at 4:58am

    @wtfwjd... I thought we already knew what he was doing...

  • 35 48
    Submitted by im_twelve on Jul 22, 10 at 3:57pm

    fat people are stupid

  • 42 63
    Submitted by ElementBabe on Jul 21, 10 at 10:31am

    Wooooowww!!! He must b freakin amazing!!!!

  • 43 66
    Submitted by jaytkabb on Jul 21, 10 at 12:11pm

    She sounds fat.

  • 41 65
    Submitted by peytonmanning on Jul 22, 10 at 2:11am

    Peyton Manning had sex with a dolphin

  • 38 61
    Submitted by im_twelve on Jul 22, 10 at 4:34am

    Yummy birthday cake

  • 31 47
    Submitted by ieleyouveesecs33 on Jul 22, 10 at 2:02am

    great imagery. O.o

  • 26 43
    Submitted by Premeau on Jul 22, 10 at 1:49pm

    so your fat but you like skinny guys

  • 35 64
    Submitted by im_twelve on Jul 22, 10 at 3:59pm

    lord lord lord lord lord jeses jeses jeses jeses

  • 37 68
    Submitted by shelbels8 on Jul 21, 10 at 10:08am

    I love you firsty. Marry me?

    • 34 47
      Submitted by firsty on Jul 21, 10 at 12:55pm

      asl? :P

  • 16 28
    Submitted by Dsapeer on Jul 19, 12 at 10:50pm

    Jesus is fake, so he couldn't finger you.

  • 32 60
    Submitted by Dumbledore_Died on Jul 21, 10 at 2:47pm

    Spoiler alert: Dumbledore dies.

  • 26 56
    Submitted by HaleyPie on Jul 23, 10 at 1:14am

    So just because she said birthday cake she's fat? Morons. I would love to fuck Jesus.

  • 22 48
    Submitted by Anonymous1024 on Jul 22, 10 at 4:47pm

    i want birthday cake now

  • 31 66
    Submitted by pvgurl16 on Jul 21, 10 at 10:04am

    Fuck yessss

  • 33 85
    Submitted by Rosamondmoonpie on Jul 21, 10 at 10:11am

    These pretzels are making me firsty