my brain is sober enough to have a conversation.. but my arms feel nice
So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
Randomize