Awkward medical moment of the day: A very obese girl with a disorder that literally makes her hit herself punched herself in the face. Literally. While screaming 'MCDONALDS MONEY'. Right. Beside. Me.
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
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