dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
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I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
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If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
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