The midget we rented got so drunk last night he got carted off in an ambulance
My Higher Power is John Stamos
why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
im about as happy as oj after his trial
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
Randomize