Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
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