Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
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