Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
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