wrigley field is MILF paradise
My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
He showed up at my apartment drunk with a telescope wanting me to look at the "blown up star" in -24 degree weather, claiming "it's in the name if science"
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
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