There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
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Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
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Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
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