Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
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she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
You passed out across the stairs with your feet and arms through the railings so you "wouldn't fall down when you blacked out and no one could get the pizza past you without waking you up". \n\nYou're the smartest drunk I know.
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
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just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
Apparent my drunk ass was so dedicated to taking a piss, when I walked across the dance floor to get to the bathroom a 9/10 broad tried to dance with me and I just pushed her aside, like hard enough to send her a few feet from where she was standing, pointed at her and said "Not now chief, gotta rock a mean one."
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