The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is a mass text. First one to reply gets head.
Before anyone claims this, this chick is in my boyfriend's phone as "Worst BJ EVER!"
Does that mean you're calling dibs or can I?
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
His nipple licking is glorious
Randomize