i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
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he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
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Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
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