Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
Why is "Oprah of drinks" written on my arms?
You said to write it on you, after you kept saying, "You get a drink, you get a drink, everyone gets a drink."
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
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