the new term for farting is butt boxing.
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
the semester isnt officially over until i take the batteries out of my calculator and put them back into my vibrator
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
You know you've been on Tinder too long when you're the guy cropped out of the profile pic. Of a woman you're still seeing...
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
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