you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
I can feel your judgement through the phone
Tripping over coffee tables hurts shins but face is okay bc I landed on a sofa.
i think i just naturally attract stoners
Randomize