a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
Randomize