I feel like I'm in dance class right now
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
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