I accidentally had phone sex last night
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
Eric and I got kicked off of karaoke last night. Apparently, singing about masturbation to the tune of "A Whole New World" is not appropriate and definitely frowned upon by the DJ.
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
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