Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
We need to get me chipped asap
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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