i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
Apparently nothing brings out sympathy in a barista like asking if they have a hangover special
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
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