I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
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