hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
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