only you would photoshop your dick
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
Everytime I come home this stoned I masturbate in the shower for that long, its like my lonely ritual. Accept me.
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
Randomize