So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
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We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
I'm like, not good at living.
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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