Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i accidentally sent all my draft messages..how do i do damage control for the multiple "fuck me now" type msgs sent at ten am?
arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?
Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.
I woke up with my face covered in mustard. Your mom said I ate hotdogs like a pornstar
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
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