the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
I also was calling every child by their name "Birthcontrol" - straight people are fun
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
Nothing like having your house arrest ankle bracelet vibrate and take a moisture sample at the exact moment you're about to blow it in some chick...buzzkill
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
When you wanted to give that guy at McDonalds your number you asked the cashier if you could borrow "a pen or just like a straw with his blood on it". He gave you a pen.
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