Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
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