She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
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