absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
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