his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
While leaving the bar with another guy I told the bouncer I was sad his friend had a fiancee
You were drinking Everclear weren't you?
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
He tried to kiss me in the middle of hooking up... it was a deal breaker. I got off him and left.
So making out with chicks at the bar is fine and dandy, but your booty call can't kiss you? You have the strangest fucking rules...
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
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