these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
Last night I had a dream we played Uno and had sex. You won at Uno, but you lost at sex.
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
WTF was I supposed to tell them? "hi mom and dad, this is some rando I met on the internet. please ignore the noises that will be coming from my bedroom for the next 60-90 minutes. kthxbye."
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
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