Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
Randomize