Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
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Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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