Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
Please tell me you werent the one who replaced every beer bottle in my fridge with a picture of a baby kitten.
... and if i was..
Fuck. You.
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
Randomize