if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
rest in peace liver.
It was nice having you occupy space in my body that could be holding beer n chicken.
that's going in my livers obituary.
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
Randomize