So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
Just got a message from a drag queen on okcupid. I cant even catfish successfully.
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
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